More on Moses

Moses reminds me of a little child in this passage where God speaks from the cloud. He's bit whiny and lazy...actually he kinda reminds me a bit of myself. I have no idea what Mount Sinai must have looked like, or how large it was, but the fact that they continue to reference it in this passage as a mountain was what caught my eye today. That God gives Moses a bunch of instructions to tell the people..."have them be clean, don't let them touch the mountain, let them hear my voice..." But then God calls Moses to the top of the mountain, so after the mountain is covered with smoking fire and shook from a violent earthquake, Moses willingly CLIMBS A MOUNTAIN. Not just takes a small hike up the hill, but climbs a mountain. I imagine he must have been in better shape than i am because he had just made the trek from Egypt to Mount Sinai...eating only manna and quail (a diet i would have for sure tired of after the first week). So he huffs and puffs his way up to the top only to hear God say, "Go back down and tell the people not to touch the mountain!" Really God?! I just got my tired self up here and now you're saying go back down!?

Do you ever feel like Moses? Like you are sacrificing and climbing your mountain in order to please God and then just when you think you are at the top and it's time to rest, you're told to go back down and start the journey over! I'm with moses on this one. Verse 23 of Chapter 19 says, "Moses protested!" Darn right he protested! What a frustrating message to hear. But. That's what follows the protest. But, God... And then, Moses went back down.

One summer i was working for a mission organization, overseeing three mission trip sites in Colorado and Wyoming. It was a hard summer! I felt like I was doing my very best for God and making all kinds of sacrifices for Him. I was exhausted, at the end of my rope, and ready to come to the final week of the summer. I had three very difficult sites that summer with lots of staff issues, and spiritual warfare type stuff. So i was going to end my summer at my easiest site and just coast on home. Then the phone rang!

One of the sites in South Dakota had had a terrible accident and all the staff were in the hospital. They still had one week left of students coming, and there was no one to run the show. So, instead of dropping to my knees and praying for these poor friends who were badly hurt, one of them even in a coma, I threw a temper tantrum with God! I cried, yelled, hollered, threw my fists in the air and blatantly told God that He was asking too much of me! I knew i'd end up going eventually (it was my job and i didn't really have a choice), but before i went, i turned into a whiny little kid and cried my eyes out. I was exhausted. I couldn't do another week, including making an 8 hour drive to South Dakota the next day.

Kelly protested!

But.

But i went anyway. Reluctantly, even begrudgingly. I went with a bad attitude and a broken spirit but i went! And what came of that week is by far one of my most memorable weeks in a three year history with this mission organization! Kids' lives were dramatically changed. My life was dramatically changed.

I say all of this for one reason. I think that both Moses' story and my story show us that God is not a God who expects us to be anything other than what we are. broken. sometimes whiny. lost. hurt. tired. confused. However we are, we are given permission to be real with God. No need to fake a willingness. No reason to fake happiness. No chance at convincing God we are joyful when we're not. God takes us as we are, and uses whatever we are willing to offer. And that, my friends, is Good News!

Happy Wednesday!
kelly